What is an EMDR session like?
A typical EMDR session , step by step—
1. Check-in and grounding
The therapist begins by:
Checking how you’re doing that day
Making sure you feel safe and grounded
Reviewing coping tools (like breathing or visualization)
This part matters—EMDR isn’t rushed, especially for teens.
2. Choosing the focus
Together, you decide what to work on, or continue a memory from a prior session. This might be:
A specific memory
A moment that still feels upsetting
A negative belief connected to it (like “I’m not safe” or “I’m not good enough”)
You don’t have to explain every detail. Often it’s just a brief label for the memory.
3. Bilateral stimulation + brief focus
This is the part EMDR is known for.
You focus lightly on the memory or belief
At the same time, the therapist guides back-and-forth stimulation, such as:
Following a moving finger or light with your eyes
Alternating taps on your hands
Alternating sounds in headphones
This happens in short sets (usually 20–30 seconds).
4. Noticing, not forcing
After each set, the therapist asks something like:
“What do you notice now?”
You might notice:
Thoughts
Images
Feelings
Body sensations
Or sometimes… not much at all (which is totally normal)
There’s no right answer. You just report what comes up, and the therapist guides the next set.
5. Shifts happen gradually
As the session continues:
The memory often feels less intense
Emotions soften or change
New thoughts may appear that feel more balanced or realistic
You’re not reliving the event—you’re observing it with more distance.
6. Closing the session safely
Before ending, the therapist:
Makes sure your distress level is low
Helps you return fully to the present
Uses grounding techniques if needed
You should leave feeling stable, not overwhelmed.
Between sessions:
You might feel tired, thoughtful, or emotionally lighter
New insights or dreams can happen
Or nothing noticeable at all
All of these are normal. The therapist checks in next time.
What surprises many people
You stay in control the whole time
You can pause or stop whenever you want
You don’t need to talk much
It often feels calmer than people expect